I’m only on Facebook 2 days a week at the moment. Lets see how that goes after I attend a Social Media for Business thingy soon. That should be interesting!!
But for now, that is how it is as a part of my experiment to see if I can use Facebook recreationally and not like it is some addictive crack.
It’s been over 2 weeks. I can’t remember the exact day I decided to have a rest from social media. I’ll know if I check my last FB update though. Ah, haha…there it is. The lure to return to the space.
I have really enjoyed this experiment..an experiment I wasn’t actually planning to participate in. But an experiment that I have liked. Dare I say loved.
I didn’t realise how much I used Facebook as a space where I would lose so much time. Lose so much energy. Lose so much..of myself.
Some old patterns or habits of mine are hard to break. And pattern awareness is where my energy is at at the moment.
I used to bite my fingernails. Like really bite them. Oh the gnawing my little nails took.
Since I was a kid I bit away. At school. In front of the TV. In the car. Shopping. Reading. No where was off limits. Even when I was nursing…(I know, it’s hard not to judge me on that one).
I tried “Stop and Grow”, I tried acrylic nails, I tried a rubber band around my wrist, which if that has ever worked for anyone, can you let me know…
Well into my adult years I was a biter. WELL into. Late 30’s WELL.
I don’t bite my nails now days. At all.
So what changed?
83 days of no booze and 7 days of no Facebook. Talk about detox central. No small things for this little boozing social media mouse!
I’ve done all manner of detoxes when my body has asked for it. But to date, I have never done the combo of alcohol and social media.
And so it begins.
But why? Why did I even think this was necessary?
The older I get the more in tune I get with my body. The more I notice things that feel like freedom and light and expansive and the more I notice things that make me feel anxious, overwhelmed and contracted.
I was scrolling through Facebook recently and felt like I had entered a foreign land.
Comparison-ville. Green. Lush. Filtered.
I never really intended to be the ‘sober one’.
I never ever thought that I would choose to go alcohol free, just as an experiment. As an opportunity to observe myself without it.
I started drinking when I was 15 years old.
Back then, there was this service called “Ring a Drink”. You’d call up, order what you wanted and they would turn up at your door and magically, you would be with booze. Like pizza delivery only alcohol.
Needless to say, that service didn’t last long. Not surprising if they dropped off alcohol to me and my friend at 15 years old! And in case you are curious, it was Midori. And I still shiver up and down my spine when I think of drinking that green juice.
We were at my neighbours house. She had gone to her boyfriends house and said that we could ‘hang’ there for the night. We did more than hang. I can still remember opening the door to the young ‘Midori Man’, making the cash exchange, and closing the door in utter excitement and disbelief we had the juice.