Hi beauty! Let’s talk stickiness shall we?
Being ‘stuck’. Getting ‘stuck’. I’m stuck.
I can’t tell you how many times Ive felt like that in my life. And I can’t tell you how many folks I have worked with who have felt the same.
I’ve stood in front of mentor groups, and mirrors and been sitting in the car and said the words, “I just feel stuck”. I’ve sat in groups of people who have done the same. I have sat across from countless folks, slumped shoulders, head down, exhaling heavy. “I just feel stuck”.
So what is this stickiness? This feeling of feeling immobilised? Of not really knowing what to do next?
So, what do I do when I notice recurring patterns? I get my curious investigator pants on, and I go seeking to feel into what might be REALLY true about this sensation, or story of ‘stuck’.
The first place I usually head for clarity, is the the work of my mentor Martha Beck.
Here’s what she has to say about stuck.
“Many of my clients who say they are hopelessly ‘stuck’, are just waiting for permission to trust their night vision, their Shaman senses. At heart, they already know what their lives are meant to be. Not accepting this knowledge, not making it conscious and acting on it, is draining and weakening them. They feel physically and emotionally, slightly or horribly ill”.
“You may feel as though you get stuck in blind alleys. You may sense your ultimate future and purpose but see no way to get there. It’s like pointing to a spot on the globe – Paris, Buenos Aires, Timbuktu – and knowing, “YES! THATS WHERE I AM GOING”. And then finding yourself shackled to the wall of your mothers house or your career as an accountant or the town you always meant to leave”.
Recently I attended a incredible event, where a group of women gathered with the intention to really activate their inner light house. I know it’s a word that conjures up a whole lot of images, but the event was tailored specifically for the active ‘lightworker’. The person who really wants to use their life to help elevate the light on the planet….and are actively working to do that.
I had a whole lot of ‘ah-ha’s’ and inspiration came flooding through. And as a result, I am feeling the desire to create again. And it is in the process. And incredibly invigorating. I came back charged and really owning my desires. Really ready to speak them out. To share them. To allow them to come into my experience.
And yet, as some time passed, there was a sense of ‘oh-o’. There was a sneaky vibe of ‘is that dream too big’? Other things like, “who am I to do that” and “when am I going to have time in my freaking fully booked schedule”?
Then, road blocks appear. And I’ve had some things that haven’t appeared to ‘go my way’ in the direction I was happy on. And the temptation is to interpret that as a ‘sign’ to stop. A ‘sign’ that you aren’t actually on the right path.
It isn’t our dreams that are too big it seems. Rather, the impediments that stop us from moving along the path we are meant to be on in alignment with our right lives, is merely our beliefs. The things that rattle around to keep us safe. In our dungeons. Away from harm.
Martha suggests that it is possible the ‘stuckiness’ itself offers a way to move forward.
“If you feel like you are on the right path but have become stuck, don’t assume that you’ve got the wrong destination. Consider, instead, that you may be misinterpreting what you hear and therefore countermanding your own destiny”.
What is a countermand, I hear you say?
Basically, it is an instruction that another command should not follow. In simple terms, it’s a ‘yeah-but’.
“I see myself writing a best selling novel BUT I have no writing experience and no one will publish my book”.
“I can see the perfect partner for me BUT I’ve tried all the dating sites and they are shit”.
“I want a part time job BUT I have so much already to do for the family I just can’t”.
The ‘yeah-but’ is pretty much an involuntary response that are like mental cockroaches (Martha always has the best animal imagery). They can survive a nuclear explosion. And you can argue and try to reason with them, but each time you cut down a yeah-but, tow more grow like a rouge chin hair plucked from a middle age woman.
The ONLY way to deal with a countermand, is to flip it.
It’s a three step process, and will ONLY work on those who are really ready to flip it. So, I’m not going to include it in this email, because I don’t want to waste the potency of it.
If in fact you feel like that you are stuck and you want to get the funk out, then you need to act.
And this step could be the very thing that gets you out of the stuck.
You action step is merely to email me and I just email you the steps.
This is not a con, or a ploy to hook you in with any sell jobs. It is simply a test that coaches do to check for readiness. If the student is ready, they will show it.
The first step in getting unstuck is to admit you are stuck. No shame in it y’all. Comes with being human on this adventure!
So, I am standing at the edge of the quicksand, or sandpit with a rope in my hands, but you have to ask for the rope. If you really want out.
The rope awaits……..
Until next we meet, know what you love, do what you love, be what you love.