I cannot tell you how many times, my mind has had me in all kinds of expectation spills over the years.
Expectations of other people. And as a recovering control freak, I used to have pretty high expectations of how people ‘should’ behave in the world.
The bar was pretty high.
People ‘should’ get back to me when I message them.
They ‘should’ just know that when they say that I will feel like this.
It’s a kind of passive aggressive way of saying, “if you behave like that, I will feel like this, and instead of me actually taking responsibility and making a choice that supports me, I will blame you because you are flawed and are triggering me”.
It wasn’t until I found the work of Byron Katie that my little mind started to shift. In a positive direction.
If you haven’t heard of Byron, it is time.
I could go on and on about her method, about how she woke up and became enlightened, but I’d be here for ages and well, you can find that out for yourself.
But what I did want to say, is how the work has impacted my little world.
Whenever I am triggered by someone else, when I feel frustrated by their behaviour or am feeling the expectation spill loading up, I do the work.
If I am harbouring resentment, or frustration about someone else, I do the work.
I show up. I am prepared to own my own shit. And I do the work.
If I am in pain because of my thinking, I do the work.
I do it so imperfectly a lot of the time, and sometimes it takes me 3 days, or 3 weeks or in some cases 3 years (Yes, I am admitting that), but I’ll do the work.
Sometimes I do it on my own, sometimes I ask for it to be facilitated with a mentor.
Either way, I am not prepared to suffer any more in this lifetime.
And as someone who has spent a bit of time suffering, when you get out of that suffering, you are willing to do whatever it takes to not go there again!
There are many ways to freedom. And all of them require action. Only always. And thinking about taking action is something I noticed that perpetuated the suffering.
The Work is available on line for free. You just down load the worksheet and begin.
There are a bunch of practitioners who facilitate the process as well if you feel like you might not be able to stretch that far for yourself just yet.
I am able to take you through the process as well, so if you feel like you want to explore some of your frequent and piss you off kind of thoughts, we can do that via zoom. Best do the free 30 minute soul vibe session to see if we vibe first though.
If you are struggling with being triggered because of how someone else is behaving, the Work is for you.
And it’s for you, because you are not meant to suffer because of your thoughts about someone else.
And it is only our thinking that is causing the suffering. Only 100% of the time.
Go gently with yourself. Always.
Keep being brave. Keep showing up. Keep sharing beautiful unique you.