Actually, there really is one reason that folks don’t move forward. Fear. But let’s break it down to the top 4 was fear shows up, preventing us from moving forward.
Comparison. Procrastination. Distraction. Perfectionism.
- Comparison. What are they doing? How are they better than me? Is mine as good, as big as nice as theirs?
I absolutely have been crippled by this one in the past! No doubt about it.
But here is what I know to be true. When I compare myself, it 100% of the time never leaves me feeling particularly good. And, when I don’t feel good, I don’t create good. Period.
Now, I get it is easy to say, “Just don’t compare yourself” and a damn sight harder not to. I get that it is challenging not to scroll through the socials, or the emails or the things and be all like, “what the fk and I doing with my life. I’m such a doosh”.
But, as we know, being an arsehole to ourselves just does not get good results.
For a long time I was looking at my peers and saying, “Shit, I am so shit. Look at how awesome their creations are. They are so amazing and I am shit. I’d be looking and going, ‘what are they doing, what are they doing, what are they doing…….” and sending myself into a shit storm of not feeling good enough. As you read this, you may be doing the same!
I can tell you honestly, it is SUCH a waste of time comparing. Just lets get on with sharing our gifts! **Oh, and if you don’t know your gifts, I bet you just got triggered and now compare yourself to those who know theirs!
Honestly. ask yourself now. What have you been putting off? What is the thing that you know you want to do, but, you find all kinds of ways to procrastinate on it?
2. Procrastination. Tomorrow. Later. Next week. Next month. How long have you been putting something off until tomorrow?
When are you going to wake up to the fact that this one little life you have…it is gong to end. It is the to do that thing.
If you are a known procrastinator. you may benefit from support. An accountability partner or group. Put your hand up, own it and lets get on with it!
3. Distraction. Oh, look, something shiny over there!
Oh god. This is me. The excitable type. The seeker type. But the shadow side of distraction is the ‘not good enough’ type. They type where we tell ourselves that we need more to feel better, or more to do the thing we love or more in general.
Distraction is one of our biggest sabotages now days because we have SO many opportunities to be distracted. Oh, so many.
So, again, this is about PAYING ATTENTION to where your attention actually is. Is it in a place that feels expansive and honouring of your gifts? Or is it a place for you to hide?
4. Perfectionism. It has to be perfect before I act. I have to be perfect, before I act.
This one…it’s a doozy! It can fk up most of us in the most subtle and unassuming ways.
Perfectionism is rigid and angular. It implies there is only one way and anything out of that is not good enough.
It is making only things right and wrong. And, well, we simply cannot do wrong darling. Right?
Perfectionism keeps us small and judgemental.
It says that unless everything is perfect, it just isn’t worthy of doing.
God help me.
I am the farthest from perfect you are likely to find. What I wear. How I do my hair and make up. How I talk. How I write. And yet, you will find me out in the world creating and creating and creating.
Why. Because I have a DEEP awareness that NOTHING is perfect. And, that is actually what makes things perfect!
Get your thinking bits around that.
It is through CONSISTENT imperfect action that I improve. That I learn. That I grow. That I get to be of service.
And here is the reason I consider myself successful. Mostly. Mostly because I am epically imperfect in most all that I do. But I do it anyway!
My ability to be agile. To be flexible. TO shift. TO change. TO move in alternate directions. Slice like a ninja. Yah!
In the world as it is right now, things are moving at an exponential rate. Right?
And those that are crushing it, are those who are fast to course change if required. Are agile in their thinking. Are not black and white, right and wrong. They allow folks to have their own thinking without making their way, wrong.
Move with quick and easy grace.
And do it imperfectly.
Some folks think they have to learn all the stuff before they act.
But we have it wrong.
We have to act to learn. We have to act to grow. We have to act to make progress.
PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION is my life motto. I stole it from Kris Carr, so steal it from me if it helps!
Now…what is that thing you want to do? Create? Be?
It’s time my sweet. It’s time.